Maze Daiko in Concert!

I don't even know how to begin to recap this concert. It was such a journey, it really was. Parts of it started so long ago, and other parts only fell into place as the time drew near. What made it special was all the dedication of the members of Maze. They're all such pro's in their own rights, and coming together in collaboration made for a great show.

I for one, was filled with anxiety the whole time. There were so many goals for me to achieve. The first was composing my own first song, Naori. I must be game for a challenge, since I composed the song in 6/8, which is the meter that has been dogging me for years. On top of that, I had to compose my own solo, in six (!), as well as be the creative go-to person for the song. I'm never that person. But it's like I had to make these creative decisions, and though I had something of a vision, it was a position I was green at being in. I think the song went well. It starts off with the most quiet delicate pattern I could possibly play on a shime. This pattern, played 8 times, gave me no end of grief. A month before the concert I broke my favorite bachi, and that was the bachi I was going to use for the song. So I experimented with different bachi, and settled on heavier bachi, only to drive myself into an anxiety-ridden frenzy, since it's really hard to play something really softly with heavy bachi, and even more impossible if your hands are all nerves and shakes, which only adds again to the nerves. It was awful. Just plain awful. The week before the show I was panicking. So stressed. But I finally allowed myself a compromise with a lighter pair of bachi and a new attitude. And then it was cool.

I worked really hard at composing solos, learning new patterns, new sequences, entire new songs. It was hard work. It's been a long process. Finally a couple days before the show I began to feel solid. The stress eased. The songs were in my body. I began to relax. Began to think about projecting. And then one evening I was like, Oh, I should just review my Kanki solo. I wrote this solo way back in 2005 and have been playing it ever since then, pretty much flawlessly. It's been set and projected so many times that I've ignored it. But then I started thinking about this one part, and then I was like, Hmm, is that how I play it? And then when we were rehearsing I thought way too much about it, and then I couldn't remember how it went at all, and then things just exploded into a horrible downward spiral. For the life of me, I couldn't remember how the solo went. It was really bad. I stayed late to work on it. I reviewed it. I re-wrote it. And in my mind I was like: Oh no! How could this happen? Why am I stressing out about this solo, of all things?

But then I realized that I knew exactly what my mind was doing. My mind was distracting me from all the other things that I could be stressing about! Like there was this one side of me that was totally stressed about new material and new solos, and I had worked so hard to perfect and perform them, and I was finally at the point where I could actually perform them. And then there was the other side of me that was protective of that new vulnerable side, and it was saying, Hey look at me! Over here! Worry about me instead! And it worked. I was so distracted about this solo, I didn't even think about all the other stuff. And yo, I nailed it! The other stuff that is. Mangled my solo. But eh, I can live with that!

The audience was great. My Dad was there. Teachers past and present were there. Old friends and the newer ones met along the way. Maze had a wonderful show. I am proud of us and all the hard work that went into this. There were moments of fear but we worked through it, didn't back down, and I am grateful for that.

Just wanted to end this post with a quote I found on Canadian money (!) of all places:

"Could we ever know each other in the slightest without the arts?"