Coming Out of the Haze

The concerts left me physically and emotionally drained. My mind has been a haze that I am only now coming out of. Usually listening to music on my ipod provides some comfort, but there is a part of me that can't even bear to listen to music. At first all I listened to were my ocean wave and rain soundtracks. Just the push and pull of water, the sound of it falling. And then a little later I could bear the sound of classical music--cello song moving up and down like breath. Couldn't bear the sound of a beat, of rhythm. Today I am listening to Steve Reich's "Drumming." Yes it's got meter and rhythm, but not in a conventional way. The music shifts too much to even tap your foot to. But it's what I need. That slow adjustment into the light. 

Recently in China they rescued a small group of mine workers who had been trapped in utter darkness for weeks. They showed pictures of them in a hospital, their eyes covered in black cloth to protect their vision from the light of this above-ground world, their bodies battered and exhausted.

I am trying to unwrap the dark layers of cloth, not from my eyes, not even from my ears, but from my heart maybe.