Bust a Gut

So today we were working on Matsuri solos. I don't know why I stress out so much about this. I think I'm the only one with a solid set solo. I was listening and watching the other solos, and they are wonderful and genki and energetic. Mine is not so much so. Set, yes. But today Janet said that since I'm last solo, that I really need to work on projecting the energy of it. That I need to "bust a gut" and just belt it out. This is something she's been telling me for years. But since I'm last solo, I feel the need to work on this more. The other players have longer solos than me. Listening to people play longer solos than me has always made me feel a little inadequate. Why don't other people struggle as much as I do? How can they just stand up there and solo and solo and solo? I spend so much time composing and setting solos that when it comes time for show and tell, I feel like maybe I should have added more content. But I've been really thinking about solos lately, and while longer solos are impressive and there is nothing bad about them, I think that really projecting the energy of whatever you've got is important too. It's not about length, but quality. Watching Kodo has got my mind thinking. So today when I was listening to the longer solos, I still felt that my solo was too short, and in between takes I asked Janet, woefully, Should my solo be longer? she said that no, it wasn't about length. My solo wasn't too short. Just that I needed to project. Which is what I've been thinking all along! So that is something I continue to work on. Project! Project! Bust a gut!